Still holding out.

6 days past ovulation… sorta

I have not used that 1 test yet.  It has been tough.  I’ve wanted to.  I’m just worried that if I do, then it will be gone and I won’t be able to test again until Tuesday so I hold off.  Of course, if by some chance it was +, I wouldn’t have to test again! 🙂  The agency was so cute – asking me what date the clinic said I could test on.  I honestly have no clue what date they said to test on because it never registered in my brain.  I think she tried to tell me to wait 14 days from the date of transfer but there is simply no way that is ever going to happen.  P, J, us and our kids all have a dinner date planned on Tuesday where we will test.  The thing is, sorry P and J, but it would tickle me so much to know before going there that it was +.  Then I wouldn’t have to worry about feeling guilty if it is not once we are there.

I’m still in restriction mode on the workouts.  I’m thinking I can take up light walking or something shortly but I have to go find the old e-mail that said that.  Of course, anything that is going to implant by now, has, and either way I don’t really think exercise would have anything to do with success or not.  Still, I know if it isn’t + I’ll feel guilty without having done anything so I certainly don’t need to make that worse.

Asher caught himself a grasshopper.  I know!  He is 2!!  He was in the front yard playing while I was weeding.  (OK, he was weeding while I lounged with a lemonade and a book.) I heard him calling me so I turned around and he presents his tightly shut little baby fist to me and says “gapper”.  My first thought was that he had found himself a pet rock and named it “Gapper” which I thought was an extremely odd little name for a rock, and yet, not without its appeal.  I seriously did NOT think he had anything alive inside that hand.  He kept holding it out and repeating himself and wanting me to respond so I said “That’s great honey!  Can I see it?”  He replied “No, gapper go.”  This was when I started to think HE thought what he had was alive.  See, I still didn’t think he could’ve actually caught anything.  Maybe it was a leaf or something that looked like a bug.  That’s when I figured out ‘gapper’ to be ‘grasshopper’.  “Oh, you have a grasshopper there?” “Yes, gapper.”  Now, I have to say, I don’t approve of my children torturing bugs and other small animals for their own satisfaction much.  My normal response to these things (yes, spiders, pill bugs, butterflies, whatever) is to say, OK, let’s let it go back to its family now.  Do you think it misses its Mommy?  My theory is that by relating it to something they know, I might instill a respect in them for all life, including the buggy type.  The only one I do not do that with is mosquitoes.  Those all need to die.  Quickly.  Preferably before biting me or anyone I know.  Oh, and june bugs and boxelders because they give me the creeps.  Still, I never believed he had an actual bug in that little shut hand of his.  I saw nothing sticking out and his hand was too small to fit one and really, he is TWO.  He does NOT have the reflexes to catch a living toddler fearing grasshopper.  A pretend bug still counts for teaching bug sympathy though so I suggested he let it go to its family and he agreed.  Then he opened his hand and the giantest grasshopper you have ever seen leaped right at me!!  “Asher!  You had a grasshopper in your hand!”  “Ya, gapper go.”