Why I am a horrible mother

I just kicked my sick fever running sore throat son out of my bed.  He was snoring.  I love my children, I really really do, but I also love being able to sleep without constant snoring in my ears.  I sleep VERY lightly so everything wakes me up.  When I was a kid I had hamsters.  One night one of the hamsters had gotten out of his cage and met up with our cat.  Turns out, they didn’t hit it off very well and that hamster squeeled with all his hamster might.  I woke up and saved him.  (Well, he actually died shortly after, probably from pure fright because he wasn’t actually damaged from our cat carrying him around in her mouth.)  Anyway, the point is, a freaking hamster can wake me up – a 9 year old with clogged sinuses snoring like a truffle pig at a mushroom convention means mom gets NO sleep.  To my credit, I told him he could sleep on the couch just outside my room and I’d check on him regularly.

So yes, that makes the third child out of three to run a fever since the new year.  What are the odds that I won’t be coming down with this?  Well, I’m hoping for that hand full of aces and maybe I’ll get lucky.  Gavin is out of school though and I’ll be working from home to stay with him in the morning.  This brings up a question for me.  He will be 10 this summer.  Do 10 year olds still go to daycare in the summer?  Is he mature?  No, not really.  I mean, he doesn’t care at all if he gets his homework done and he leaves the milk on the counter from breakfast and he whacks his siblings on the head any time he walks by just because.  I wouldn’t call that mature.  He IS independent though.  He begs to be left home alone and he really is terribly self sufficient.  I think that he would be safe if he were home alone.  My concern is for when he is not home alone.  Summer means neighborhood kids also out of school and I suspect he’d have friends in and out of the house and he’d be all over the neighborhood.  There is where I see the trouble coming.  Legally, I don’t know if MN has any rules.  Maryland states 8 years old as the cutoff for any home alone time.  Another state, though I forget which, ‘suggests’ no younger than 14.  There’s a big difference there.  Either way, ‘daycare’ seems a bit odd.  It makes me wish someone would open something special just for the 10-13 age range just for summer care.  Maybe I’ll get lucky and his school will offer summer school for him – although I doubt HE’d see that as ‘lucky’.

I have a question for you Microsoft Vista experts out there.  We have just installed (on purpose.. yes really) Vista onto Gavin’s computer.  The reason was 100% because of the parental controls Vista gives you.  It allows us to set the times that the computer will and will not run for any given user so that Gavin can log into his computer and play all on his own but it will still not let him log in at 3AM.  This is good because we HAD to put a password on his computer to keep him off of it at night but that left us annoyed beyond belief because EVERY time he wanted to play we had to go log him in.  Generally, this meant Gavin was in our room at 6:30 AM on the weekend asking to have us log him in so he could quietly play without waking anyone up.  The Vista change has been wonderful and there is peace in our house again.  In fact, it is even set up to kick him off for meal times so if he happens to be playing  just before lunch or dinner he will come downstairs all on his own.

The trouble comes in with one game in particular.  It is an online game and to run it means running a launcher that checks your files against the online files to see if you need an update.  Clearly, Vista wants you to be an admin to do this type of thing.  We can SAY ‘run as admin’ and type in our password, but it doesn’t want to stick permanently.  It makes us put in the password every time.  This is annoying because, well, I think I covered that in the last paragraph.  Is there a way that we can permanently say “run as admin” so it doesn’t prompt for the password each time?  I read something about going to the game properties that I’m going to try but the website sounded suspiciously like you had to be an admin in order for this to work.

On the pregnancy topic, we’re now about 25 and 1/2 weeks along.  I’m pretty confident now that no matter what we’d make it to the 26 week time frame which seems pretty important ‘preemie’-wise.  Honestly, I want to go to 41 weeks JUST because I’m still mad at the US tech for telling me the clinic NEVER lets twins go overdue and really, I’m stubborn like that.  If I do make it to 41 weeks she can take all the credit for telling me I wouldn’t be ‘allowed’ to do that. 

Speaking of the twin birth, I am getting a tad bit more nervous about it.  I have some things I’d really like to ask my OB just to learn his stance.  I’m pretty sure he said that I would NOT be required to have an epidural, which makes me hugely happy.  I don’t recall anything about giving birth in a birthing room vs the OR so I’ll have to re-ask that.  I’m actually hoping to attempt that whole squatting thing and the prospect of climbing up on an operating table to do that sounds a bit unlikely so that will be asked.  The other big question would be on twin B.  If I’m not having a Csection, that means Twin A was vertex so we can assume that.  Twin B, however, could be hanging out horizontal up under my ribs by then for all we know.  (I’m not certain he isn’t, in fact, doing that right this very moment.)  Most OBs, from what I’ve heard, don’t like twin B to be born significantly later than Twin A and thus they go in after B.  As much as the idea of having my uterus invaded with rubber gloves hunting for baby feet appeals to me (especially considering the no epidural plan), I’d much rather just use an external monitor to make sure B’s heart rate is stable and, just, wait.  From what I understand, ‘natural’ timing for twin B can be several hours and in that time twin B can move all on his own to a better position for birth.  Hopefully I’ll remember to go over these things.  My next appointment is Tuesday, Jan 27th.  I’ll be able to ask then.  Assuming my brain hasn’t gone off to lollipop land after the glucose test drink.

I’m off to sleep now though.  After I pee.  And check on my son.  And do it all again in another 3 hours.  At least these two are cooperating.  One can sit on my bladder while the other jams up my rib cage and gives me heartburn from hell.  I just wanna tell them that NOW is not the time to complain about space issues.  If they don’t like it now, it’s about to get a WHOLE lot cozier.  At my next appointment I’ll be a few days away from 28 weeks.  That should put them at about 3 pounds each, right?

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