10 pounds of baby + 30 pounds of two year old

Fetal growth chart that I found online:  The mark was from the weight estimate at 27 weeks.  (~3 pounds each)


According to this, the boys would now weigh about 6 pounds 3 ounces each.  (That would be at 33 weeks which would be Friday, 2 days from now.)  I don’t find this to actually be possible so I’m guessing that they have slowed down a bit from their previous growth and are now closer to just 5 pounds even.  Still, that would be 10 pounds of baby, not to mention extra amniotic fluid and extra placenta.  No wonder I can’t reach the keyboard!

In the course of uterus expansion, B has apparently found a way to literally get to my ribs.  I’ve always considered this a bit of an expression for when they crowd out your rib cage in general however every once in awhile, especially as I am sitting or twisting in a certain way, I get a very painful very literal jab right at my left lowest rib.  This is very naughty and I trust P and J will have a stern speaking to B about his total disregard for others after he is born.

On non-pregnancy fronts, my 2 year old has reached a new level of insane.  This is my morning:  4:30AM, realize that I am awake and have either been having an in depth conversation with myself in my head about my children’s college fund while asleep or I have been awake for quite some time without noticing.  At any rate, I have to pee so up I go.  I spend the next hour not sleeping due to being hungry but not willing to eat anything and have to deal with heartburn plus I don’t want to walk all the way downstairs.  By 5AM I give up and turn on the computer and accidentally overwrite my very good Zuma score with a very sucky one.  By 5:30 I am able to actually fall asleep again.

5:45 and I hear Ash’s door open.  (I sleep VERY lightly.)  Now, I’m curious what he will do with free run of the house so I say nothing and just wait.  I never understand why these kids don’t get up in the middle of the night and dive into the Popsicles in the freezer or better yet, grab the keys and drive to CVS for a bit of midnight Hostess fun.  Instead, he pads his way into my room and says “Mommy?  I’m awake Mommy.”  While I’m relieved that he isn’t negotiating traffic at the nearest intersection, I’m not really wanting to get up either.  I play possum and he climbs into bed with me and snuggles into my arms and is…. quiet.  Ah bliss!  For 5 minutes.  “Mommy, what’s that?”  “The clock, go to sleep.” “Mommy, what’s that?” “A car outside, go to sleep.” “Mommy, what’s that?” “My hope of getting any sleep going totally out the window.”  “Mommy, can I go out the window?”  “Ah… don’t ask that right now.” 

Screams start as I tell him that if he cannot be quiet he must return to his own room and I carry him back.  I put him on his bed and shut the door and lay totally awake on my bed since I now actually do have to get up and ready anyway but I’d like HIM to settle down first.  He spends the next 30 minutes yelling “But Mommy I LOVE you.  PLEASE Mommy.  Please Mommy.  I LOVE you Mommy!”  You gotta give him credit for knowing how to get under your skin. 

I get up to shower and he comes out of his room when he hears me, saying that it is morning now.  He agrees to go watch cartoons while I shower.  Parenting skills +1000 for me.  Jessie gets up while I do that and a screaming match starts over who gets to hold the remote.  Kris goes into the living room and takes the remote from both of them and tells them to sit still and watch Arthur.  Parenting skills +1000 for him too. 

While I get dressed and brush out my hair, Kris tries to get Asher dressed.  Ash is having nothing to do with it as he wants to keep ON his swimming suit top and pj bottoms that he insisted on sleeping in last night (AKA, his running shirt and RED pants) and I tell Kris I don’t care what Ash wears so leave it on him.  Ash decides he needs a Popsicle NOW.  We say no.  He says yes.  We say no.  He goes downstairs. Yay.  He comes back upstairs with a package of microwave popcorn and says he wants popcorn for breakfast.  We say no.  He spends the entire rest of the time I’m getting ready upstairs hanging on me saying “PLEASE Mommy.”  “Please Mommy, I LOVE you.”  AHHHHHHHH. 

We go downstairs and Jessie gets her breakfast and we offer Ash some things he CAN have for breakfast.  He drops the popcorn and says he wants CHEESE.  Um, ok, what kind of cheese?  Mac and Cheese.  No, I’m not going to make Mac and Cheese for breakfast.  We start anew with “PLEASE Mommy.”  “Please Mommy, I LOVE you!”  I end up putting his jacket on him and buckling him into the car early so I can finish getting Jessie ready.  He trades his worries over the food to wanting his shoes on and I’m 8 million times the meanest mommy ever because I tell him no – he doesn’t get shoes when he is naughty.  The pleases start again along with some drivel about his feet being cold and he may have mentioned something about living in MN and that it is fricking COLD outside crazy lady and I shut the car door to go around and buckle Jessie in.

To prove that I’m not totally made of stone, after buckling Jessie I did go back to his door and open it and put on his shoes.  He then asked for a hug which I gave him and he calmed down and we had a pleasant drive to daycare.  We got inside and out of the winter gear there and Cindy asked him about breakfast and OMG the 2 year old hysterics start again.  Some days… just… I’m SO glad I get to go to work.

Oh, and I sat back in the chair in my car once I parked at work to rest my eyes a bit and I totally fell asleep complete with dreams right there.  I think they had something to do with college fund accounts for the kids.


One Response

  1. Great I’m loving your website.

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